Big Butts

I come from German ancestry, almost all of my fore bearers are German. I am a third generation American. However because of excessive in-breeding by my Grandparents, and parents, I am almost all German by descent.

Not too bad really, I was always a very good athlete; but there was one stigma I never could shake, the German Big Butt Syndrome (GBBS). It seems that all Germans (and their progeny) have big butts! And I don't mean kinda big, I mean BIG.

Like I said I was always a good athlete, but even in the best of shape, I still had a noticeable butt. "Bubble butt" is what they called me at work 10 years ago, while at the time I was running 35 mi. a week to prepare for a marathon!

Well here I am, 10 years older, and only jogging (maybe shuffling is a better term), 12 mi a week.

The bubble has gotten bigger.

I try not to make a habit of bending over in front of my crew at work. The whistles and the snickers, are very embarrassing! "Hey! I can't help my DNA man! Show a brother some compassion will ya?" And to think what a good boss (jeffe, in Spanish) I am to them.

Like "Dirty Harry" said,"A man has to know his limits", and right now my limits are being contained in a 36" waist. At least I know if I hap-hazardously bend over in front of someone, no one will get hurt... unless I clip them with my big butt.

Big Butts

I come from German ancestry, almost all of my forbearers, are German. I am a third generation, American. However because of excessive in-breeding by my Grandparents, I am almost all German by descent. Not too bad really, I was always a very good athlete, but there was one stigma I never could shake, The German big butt syndrome (GBBS). It seems that all Germans (and their progeny) have big butts! And I don't mean kinda big, I mean BIG. Like I said I was always a good athlete, but even in the best of shape, I still had a noticeable butt.

"Bubble butt" is what they called me at work 8 years ago, while at the time I was running 35mi. a week to prepare for a marathon! Well here I am, 8 years older, and only jogging (maybe shuffling is a better term), 12 mi a week.

I try not to make a habit of bending over in front of my crew at work. The whistles and the snickers, are very embarrassing! Hey! I can't help my DNA man! Show a brother some compassion will ya? And to think what a good boss (jeffe, in spanish) I am to them. Like "Dirty Harry" said,"A man has to know his limits", and right now my limits are being contained in a 36" waist. At least I know if I hap-hazardously bend over in front of someone, no one will get hurt, unless I clip them with my big butt.

Pop! What a Happy Sound

It's Friday...TGIF and all.

Throughout this great country of ours, one sound reverberates around it: POP! That's the sound of a beer bottle or can being opened. Let's face it -- we Americans like to drink. Come to think of it , so does everybody else! Let's see, I know the Irish do, the Germans, the Russians, the Brits, et al. Drinking is the one universal thing we can all agree on (unless you are a real devout person). We like to do it. I've already freely admitted to you that I do. Hell, I took up running 18 years ago (but now I shuffle) just so I could drink the beer I wanted without weighing 300 lbs.

Why is alcohol so popular? Well, for one thing, it tastes great. Nothing like a good cold one after work, after mowing the lawn, after sex, after the last one...There's nothing like a good cold one after your last beer. That is the problem. Beer-liking is accumulative. After a while, any excuse is a good excuse to have a beer.

So God, in his infinite wisdom, gave us a reason to not drink...work. Let's face it, if we were all rich and affluent, and didn't have to work, we would all be drunk all the time! Since God invented work, most of us have to be semi-moderate about our consumption during the work week. The people who haven't learned to be moderate are the ones we walk around on the sidewalks on the way to work. Liking something is one thing; being controlled by it is another.

The problem with all drugs is the temptation to do them exclusively -- and to hell with everything else. Not real good if you have a wife and kids counting on you. When I was a teenager, my Dad told me (over a hangover), "If you can't handle your booze, don't drink it!" Good words to live by.

Yes, it's Friday; you probably had a killer of a week. Have fun, but know when to say when.

(Wow, that was one difficult post... Now where did I leave that bottle opener?)
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