I Said, You Said

Mike's Common Sense

Everyone is probably familiar with the phrase "he said, she said", in which a couple is fighting and neither can see anything from the other person's point of view. Each person is so wrapped up in their thoughts, and feelings, that it is impossible to see that each person is correct, and each person is wrong; all at the same time.


This situation is true, not only with inter-sexual relationships, but with all conflicts in general. The reason for this is the inability to empathize outside ourselves. Empathy is the ability, or rather the gift, to be able to put yourself in someone's position, and feel their feelings. It is a sign of higher development in one's spiritual growth.


No one does something without a reason. Empathy is not an agreement with someone else, it is a knowing of where someone else stands and why. It is the ability to understand, and perhaps feel what the other person feels. When both sides of a dispute, or conflict, open themselves to empathize with the other side; resolution is the inevitable ending. This usually comes about in a form of compromise between the two parties.


When there is no attempt, or an inability to empathize, hostility is the inevitable result. In the case of two nations, this means war; in the case of interpersonal relationships this means a divorce, or violence. These are the situations where everybody loses.

Sadly, empathy is not taught in our schools. Most people have to learn it by trial, and error. Some people never learn it.

The next time you find yourself in a dispute, take a time out, and try to see things from the other person's point of view. Chances are, the other person will reciprocate. That's when everybody wins.

I Said, You Said

Everyone is probably familiar with the phrase "he said, she said", in which a couple is fighting and neither can see anything from the other person's point of view. Each person is so wrapped up in their thoughts, and feelings, that it is impossible to see that each person is correct, and each person is wrong; all at the same time.

This situation is true, not only with inter-sexual relationships, but with all conflicts in general. The reason for this is the inability to empathize outside ourselves. Empathy is the ability, or rather the gift, to be able to put yourself in someone's position, and feel their feelings. It is a sign of higher development in one's spiritual growth.

No one does something without a reason. Empathy is not an agreement with someone else, it is a knowing of where someone else stands and why. It is the ability to understand, and perhaps feel what the other person feels. When both sides of a dispute, or conflict, open themselves to empathize with the other side; resolution is the inevitable ending. This usually comes about in a form of compromise between the two parties.

When there is no attempt, or an inability to empathize, hostility is the inevitable result. In the case of two nations, this means war; in the case of interpersonal relationships this means a divorce, or violence. These are the situations where everybody loses.

Sadly, empathy is not taught in our schools. Most people have to learn it by trial, and error. Some people never learn it.

The next time you find yourself in a dispute, take a time out, and try to see things from the other person's point of view. Chances are, the other person will reciprocate. That's when everybody wins.

Are You Man Enough?

I grew up with two brothers. One was older than me, the other younger. We were all separated by one year intervals, so we grew up fairly close in age. This, of course, meant that we fought...a lot. Being the middle son, it seems that I was always in the middle of one of the fights. My older, and my younger, brothers seldom fought amongst each other.






My dad, knew that boys, would be boys, and he did not interfere with most of our squabbles (unless something got broke, then we all got spanked). But, woe to the child that started something then came running to him for help. His answer to that kid (usually me), was always firm; "If you're man enough to dish it out, you better be man enough to take it! There is nothing worse than someone who can dish it out, but can't take it!"






These words are the wisdom by which I live my life. They taught me quite a few things such as: taking responsibility for my actions, empathy for others, and that what ever I did to someone else, I had better be able to take when someone did it to me.






These three things are the cornerstone of our interpersonal relationships. Those who have learned, and follow them, are well adjusted, and normally get along with others. Those who haven't learned them are maladjusted, and unpopular. Nobody wants to associate with someone who can't "play well" with others.






We all know some of these "don't play well with others" type of people. These folks feel that they have carte blanch to do, or say, anything they want to others; but are quick to take offense when someone responds in kind to them. Perhaps they just don't realize that their behavior is churlish, and childish. Maybe they just aren't smart enough to grasp the lessons most others mastered in elementary school.






Maybe they just weren't lucky enough to have a dad like mine.

Big Daddy's Blues

I am a pretty laid-back kind of guy. I try to maintain an even keel on a day-to-day basis. But right now, I am contemplating calling the suicide hot line. I need help! You see, my wife just brought home dog number six yesterday.







Some friend of hers couldn't keep the dog when they decided to move into some swanky new condo...So guess what? I get even less room in my bed to sleep! Now, my wife is a very nice person, and an animal lover. And I am a nice guy, and an animal lover. But man, you gotta learn how to say no.






(Not that I did, when she asked me if it was ok if she brought the dog home.)






I got to admit, I am a soft touch (and soft in the head). The new dog is little more than a puppy, and she is adjusting very well with the other dogs. And she has already taken a fancy to lying in our bed...






Here is a song for you, sung to the tune "Squeeze Box" by The Who:


Mama's got six dogs, she loves them the best,


And when Daddy gets home, he can't get no rest,


'Cause they're all lying in bed,


I'll put a bullet in my head,


Mama's got six dogs, Daddy never sleeps at night.






Now one will lick his ass, another one passes gas,


And they take all the blankets that should cover my ass!


And they do it all night,


Then one will start a fight,


Mama's got six dogs, Daddy never sleeps at night.






They climb up and down, and up and down,


And up and down, and up and down,


And they do it all night, then one will start a fight,


Mama's got six dogs, Daddy never sleeps at night.






De-flea me! Won't you de-flea me!


De-flea me if you please,


I'm tired of scratching fleas,


Mama's got six dogs, Daddy never sleeps at night.