Wednesday, May 28, 2014

Untimely Interuptions

It’s a real drag to get interrupted when you are doing something you really like. You know what I mean. I’ll stomach the traffic jams, I’ll wait in lines at the bank, I’ll even handle a root canal, but, I hate it when something messes up my free time

Being interrupted is like being violated. Nobody likes being violated.

Everyone is familiar with the “calling at suppertime, sales pitch guy”. I know everybody needs a job, but these people should be tied up and forced to listen to Yoko Ono records for forty eight straight hours (I wonder what level of hell that would equate with?). I mean we have to get serious with these people!

Some of you might know the “friend who always calls when you are getting nookie guy” I had a friend in college whose clairvoyance was astounding. He always knew when I was getting laid. It got so bad that I finally learned to take the phone off of the hook (remember when you did that?), whenever I got lucky.

Other people are familiar with “I live in the middle of the approach for a major runway”, or “I live next to the railroad track” problem. When I worked at a major airline in Rochester, NY, I had a very nice top half of a house to live in. The only problem was it was in a direct line with runway 22 (short for 220 degrees.). Every night when the best television shows came on, that’s when all of the jets would decide to land. “What did he just say!?” Is what we would yell to each other as lines of our favorite show were blotted out by the screaming jet engines. As if that wasn’t bad enough, every morning about 6:30 am they would all take off again roaring right over head, shaking the house, and rattling the windows. And it was even worse if you were trying to sleep off a hangover. (Ugh!)

Last but not least is the “Asshole dog next store, barking all night long” situation. You really want to get up, walk next door, and throttle the owner. “Are you deaf man! Muzzle that dog, stupid!” I would yell as I was shaking him by his throat. Fortunately, I am way too lazy to do that; I just swear at the dog all night as I toss and turn.

Let’s face it, untimely interruptions suck.

 Like I was saying, give me your best shot, water boarding, Chinese water torture, and flaming bamboo shoots up my fingernails, just don’t bother me!
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This site is more a column than a blog. I write humorous, spiritual, and political articles. Everything I write is designed to make you think; what you think is up to you.