Wednesday, February 25, 2015

Don't Think Twice, That's Alright

There's an old saying, "If you don't use it, you lose it". If that's true, the average American brain must be in a state of atrophy. Most of us are seldom called upon to use our cerebral cortex anymore. Network TV shows, commercials, our schools, our jobs, etc. have all been "dumbed down" to the point where mental acuity is no longer necessary. No one even performs simple math anymore without the use of a calculator. Think about it, when was the last time you performed multiplication, or division on a piece of paper without a calculator?
I admit, I am as guilty as the next person; I like modern conveniences. My posts would not be the same if I did not have a spell checker to fall back on. The point I'm trying to make is that, we are now conditioned not to think, because we aren't often called upon to do so. The problem with this conditioning, is that society is quickly becoming a herd mentality. Reasoning, and creativity, are becoming things of the past. That's a big problem if mankind is to grow and prosper.
Part of this problem, is everyone's need to be entertained all the time. Whether its an i-pod, TV, computer, or cell phone, everyone is preoccupied with something. Seldom do people read in order to learn something. Novels are very popular, but, nonfiction, history, and science books seldom make the NY Times best seller lists.
I am all for entertainment; we all need to relax and get away once in a while. However, just like you need to exercise your body to keep it in proper working order; you also should have a mental exercise regimen. I like to do the NY Times crossword to keep sharp. I also will mix in informational reading, along with my favorite fiction writers.
Our children need to be taught to balance video games, and TV, with school work, and informational reading. Getting them in the habit of reading the newspaper everyday is a good start. Teach them, "if you don't use it, you lose it".

Saturday, February 21, 2015

Just Musing

  1. The most beautiful sunsets, occur after the ugliest of storms.
  2. Your best friends, are your longest friends.
  3. Life doesn't suck after 50.
  4. Sometimes you gotta admit, you got just what you deserve.
  5. You know you have to work on being patient when you run into too many red lights.
  6. Being humble is not the same as being a coward.
  7. To quote Dirty Harry:" A man has to know his limits."
  8. I try not to treat women like an amusement park ride, but I meet a lot I'd like to take a whirl with.
  9. Getting up at 3:15 in the morning, to get ready for work really bites.
  10. I'm not a philosopher, but I am a free thinker.
  11. Fight governmental micro-chipping, and mandatory vaccines. 
  12. Love yourself, respect yourself, do the same to others.

Wednesday, February 18, 2015

Are You Man Enough?

I grew up with two brothers. One was older than me, the other younger. We were all separated by one year intervals, so we grew up fairly close in age. This, of course, meant that we fought…a lot. Being the middle son, it seems that I was always in the middle of one of the fights. My older, and my younger, brothers seldom fought among each other.
My dad, knew that boys, would be boys, and he did not interfere with most of our squabbles (unless something got broke, then we all got spanked). But, woe to the child that started something then came running to him for help. His answer to that kid (usually me), was always firm; “If you’re man enough to dish it out, you better be man enough to take it! There is nothing worse than someone who can dish it out, but can’t take it!”
These words are the wisdom by which I live my life. They taught me quite a few things such as: taking responsibility for my actions, empathy for others, and that what ever I did to someone else, I had better be able to take when someone did it to me.
These three things are the cornerstone of our interpersonal relationships. Those who have learned, and follow them, are well adjusted, and normally get along with others. Those who haven’t learned them are maladjusted, and unpopular. Nobody wants to associate with someone who can’t “play well” with others.
We all know some of these “don’t play well with others” type of people. These folks feel that they have Carte Blanch to do, or say, anything they want to others; but are quick to take offense when someone responds in kind to them. Perhaps they just don’t realize that their behavior is churlish, and childish. Maybe they just aren't smart enough to grasp the lessons most others mastered in elementary school.
Maybe they just weren't lucky enough to have a dad like mine.

Saturday, February 14, 2015

Mike's Petting Zoo

It is nice to know that you are wanted. There is nothing better than knowing that when you get home after a hard day’s work there are going to be a host of people waiting for you to walk through the door.
Well I am a lucky guy because that is the world I live in… except the folks waiting for me are my pets. For those of you who have not read “Wilbur and Us” or “Big Daddy’s Blues”, I have six dogs, a pot-bellied pig, and a cat; and they all love me.
They love me because they know that “The big softy” is home and they will all get lots of love and affection.
Many of my days I leave for work at 4am, and get back home at 7pm. That is a long day for anyone, but I make sure everyone gets some loving before I go to bed.
I go out on my back patio and put on my favorite radio show (The Mike O’Meara Show); then I wait for the parade of animals. The dogs are always first, running around jockeying for position, trying to see who can get first whacks at daddy.
The first one is normally the largest Simon. Simon is a HUGE Rottweiler. He is basically mommy’s boy, but he never misses a chance with daddy.
Second is Princess, she is most senior dog in the household and that carries a lot of weight. Princess is a golden lab mix and the sweetest dog you ever met.
Third in line is Bobby. Bobby is basically my dog; he always sits with me on the patio acting as my bodyguard. Bobby is a Doberman mix breed.
The next dog to come to the plate is Buddy. Buddy is a golden lab, and I call him the “love sponge”, because he will soak up as much loving as you are willing to give. I also call Buddy “the landmine”, because as I walk through the house he will get in my way and lie down with his belly up. Buddy knows that if he can time it just right, he will get a “ten second belly rub” which he lives for.
After Buddy is finally shooed away, Chloe comes up for her turn. Chloe is an old American Bulldog, and very set in her ways. She is very lady like, but she makes sure daddy gives her what she needs.
Sophie is the newest, and last of the dogs. Sophie is a smaller mixed breed, and enjoys being petted almost as much as Buddy.
After all the dogs have been petted, and loved, Wilbur knows that it is now his turn. Wilbur is my pot bellied pig. Wilbur is very smart, he knows how to approach daddy to get what he wants. He comes up along side of my chair and nuzzles my arm. Once he knows he has my attention, he lies down on the floor with his belly facing me. I know he wants it, but I am going to tease him. I start stroking his nose, and then I rub behind his ears. After a minute I slowly move to rubbing under his chin. The hair on the back of his neck stands straight up! He knows he is going to get it and he is filled with anticipation. I slowly give him what he wants as I slide my hand down to his belly and gently rub it. Wilbur loves having his belly rubbed!
When my back finally gets stiff from leaning over and rubbing his belly, I put Wilbur to bed so I can have some peaceful time to myself. That’s when my cat Molly jumps into my lap.
Oh well, at least I don’t have to bend over, or work my arm off to pet a cat.

Tuesday, February 10, 2015

Everybody's Talkin'

Craig Wilson, of USA Today, wrote in his weekly column "The Final Word", today about the proliferation of cell phones. It was a cute article, and since we are about the same age, and from the same hometown(Rochester,NY), I related well to him. One problem, Craig, you never really talked about the main point. What the hell is everybody talking about?
Now I admit, that I am somewhat older, than the average cell phone user; but I can't imagine that they could find so much to talk about. It is mind numbing. I have 700 minutes, on my cell phone. I never use them all. I think that cell phones are great, they certainly make life a lot easier, but unless you're in sales, most people are just talking too much. Now a days it is a rarity to pass another motortist, and not see them talking or even texting (gasp! I've seen it!) while they are supposedly driving.
MIKE'S LAW: 1) If you have nothing to say, shut up. 2) If you don't know what you are talking about, shut up.
I live by both of those laws, and I wish more people would. It's not just cell phones, there are certainly enough people out there, that don't need them. You know as soon as they walk in the room, because they come in yapping away, and don't stop until they leave. They pontificate about anything and everything as if they wrote the encyclopedia. I recognize that these people just love to hear themselves talk. If you are one of these people, please refer to law #2.
We have one at work. He really isn't a bad guy, but boy does he love to hear himself talk. You know when he's coming in the break room, because you can hear him coming down the hall. And boy does he know it all! Like I said, he really isn't a bad guy, but I wish he were, because I really want to hate him.
The way I see it, there's a lot of people talking, but they aren't saying much.

Saturday, February 7, 2015

I Am an A-Hole

I am evil. I know I am evil, but I can’t help it. In fact I take a fiendish glee in being evil.
I wasn't always evil; it just came upon me about six years ago. That’s when I moved from the frozen tundra of Rochester, NY, and relocated in Miami, FL.
I remember my last day working at the airport up in Rochester, it was 5 degrees, and colder than a witch’s left bosom. In fact, the last two months I worked there, were the coldest I could remember. I really didn’t want to leave my family, and friends, but, I was forced to travel to new horizons, in order to keep my job of twenty years.
Three days later, from the back of my friend Tom’s boat, which was harbored in the Florida Keys, I discovered my evilness. It was a beautiful evening, about 70 degrees, with a gorgeous sunset off to the west. I was nursing my sixth or seventh cold brew, when I got a call from my step son on my cell phone. He told me that it was a minus 4 degrees, and snowing like a bastard up in Rochester.
That’s when I turned evil. I couldn’t help but to tell him how warm, and beautiful it was in my neck of the woods. Just to hear him tell me to go f#&k off made me feel really good. I realized that I took extreme pleasure, in pissing him off about how nice it was to live in paradise. In fact I took pleasure in pissing off everybody from up north about it.
Sometimes I would just causally mention, how it was 82, and sunny; after they told me they just got 15 inches of snow, other times I would complain that we were going through a cold spell, and that we would hit a low of 55, with only a high temperature of 72, just to hear the responses I would get from them.
There is something about living in paradise that brings out the a-hole in a guy.
If you life up north, and want to bring out your inner a-holeness, I have a guest room, give me a call.
Did I mention that we are going through a cold spell? It is supposed to get down to 60 degrees tonight. I better put on my flannel pj's tonight! Brrrr

Wednesday, February 4, 2015

Creepy Things

I am a child of the sixties. When I was growing up we had lots of creepy monster movies to watch. They were all in black and white, and they all had fairly likable heroes. They all were melodramatic, and they all had creepy, scary monsters in them. I am sure that anyone over the age of forty can remember the “monster theater”, the “chiller thriller”, or the “bewitching hour”, on one of your local three TV channels every Friday, or Saturday night, or Sunday afternoon. (For the younger reading members out there, this was before cable TV and there were only three channels you could watch).
There were lots of different creepy monsters featured in these movies; Dracula, the Mummy, Frankenstein, The Hound from Hell, etc. etc. On the weekend when we could stay up late we would spend the night getting the shit scared out of us watching one of these nefarious monsters. Oh, the bad dreams we would have after watching these movies.
I have watched, and seen many different scary monsters in my day; but I don't think any of them are as scary as the one I watched on my TV tonight.
Of course I am talking about our former Vice President Dick Chaney. Now this guy is creepy, and scary. I was scared enough of this guy when he was Vice President, but even now I am still creep-ed out by him. Now that he is out of office we shouldn't have to be afraid of him anymore, but I still get the chills every time I watch this guy.
I admit I have never seen him bite someone in the neck, or strangle anyone like some of the movie monsters, but every time I see this guy my skin crawls; he literally makes may blood run cold.
There is something reptilian about this guy. Whenever he is on TV, I expect to see his tongue dart in and out of his mouth. After watching him for the last eight years as G.W.’s main hatchet and torture guy, you would think I should be inured to his coldness, and lack of any humanity, but that is not so. Whenever I see him he makes the hair on the back of my neck stand up. I suspect he is still way too influential to take lightly. I know he had a heart transplant, but I believe he should have a stake driven through whatever heart he has left.
What dreams may come after watching Dick Chaney, must give us pause.
At least I know Dracula, and Frankenstein are make believe.

Saturday, January 31, 2015

Battling the Blues

Many people these days are struggling with depression in one form or another. This depression is often compounded in the winter time when there is less sunshine. Many people seek relief using prescription anti-depressants; and others seek it with alcohol, and other recreational drugs.
Most people who are taking antidepressants, and recreational drugs do not need to medicate themselves to feel better. Most people can find a way out of depression through natural means. We will discuss a few of these methods in a minute, but first, what is depression?
Most doctors believe that depression is caused by a chemical imbalance in the brain. While this is true in some cases such as manic-depressives, and psychotics, who need medication; most depressives can be helped without antidepressants. Antidepressants tend to suppress the emotions which makes most users feel like robots that are incapable of feeling; they seldom help as intended, and leave the user feeling empty as well as depressed. These drugs are also responsible for violent outbreaks, and suicides.
If you are one of these folks, put down your Prozac and try some of these remedies.
Cut back on your sugar intake. We all know what sugar does to children; well adults are no different. Sugar provides a lift for a short time but also induces a mood crash after it burns off.
Find ways to externalize your thoughts. Many people suffering from depression spend too much time thinking about themselves. This is the breeding ground for all sorts of negative thoughts and feelings such as worry, feelings of inferiority, and stress. The cure for this is to find things to do to get you to think of something besides yourself. This could be a hobby, volunteer work, painting, writing, or any number of things. The important thing is to find something that you really like to do, and go do it.
Get some exercise. This really ties in with externalizing your thoughts, but also provides other benefits such as producing endorphin, and other mood lifting chemicals in the brain. You don't have to be a workout warrior to get the benefits. Go for a walk, or light jog every other day, that will do wonders for your over all feeling of well being.
If you live in a northern climate take extra vitamin D during the winter time. In the winter very few people get the amount of vitamin D they need. Less sun means less vitamin D production in your body, so you need to account for this. In the winter people should be taking 2,000 - 5,000 iu's of vitamin D daily. If you have a job where you get very little sun you should also be taking vitamin D supplements daily.
Open the spiritual channels to your higher self. Man is a spiritual being living in a physical body. If the ego becomes too distant from the spiritual self, depression is often the result. Try to take a few minutes each day to open yourself to spirit. This can be done in any number of ways such as meditation, contemplation, and prayer. I personally like to take a few moments to sing the HU during the course of the day, and before bed. HU is the secret and powerful name of God which makes a marvelous mantra to reconnect with spirit. Just fill yourself with love by thinking about someone you love, and sing HU (pronounced Hugh).
As I said there are many ways to open yourself to spirit, you just need to find the best one for you.
If you are suffering from the blues, or a clinical depressive, you will find that many of these techniques will help and improve your quality of life.

Wednesday, January 28, 2015

Guardian At the Gate Of Consciousness

Spirituality has always existed, but with the emergence of Quantum Physics people are now understanding that there is scientific evidence that spirituality is real. This realization is broadening to the point that mankind is reaching a tipping point where this understanding will become universal among all men. As we approach this golden age, it is important to understand how each of us individuals play an important part in this process, as we grow individually, and collectively.
Quantum Physics has shown that the behavior of particles are influenced by having an observer present watching. It has also shown that distance is not relevant in the relationship of any two or more homogeneous particles. Science cannot really explain why this is, but both of these have have been shown in many scientific experiments; and they show the power of attention, and intention. Explaining why this is so, is where spirituality comes in.
There is One Consciousness which is referred to as God; out of this great Consciousness spring the countless states of consciousness which comprise mankind, plants, animals, and everything that exists. Each state is separate, and individual, but also still a part of the One Consciousness.
The key for each of us to learn is attention, and the Law of Attraction. What you focus your attention on, is what you will attract to you.
Most of us have been taught to love God, and hate Satan; to love good, but hate evil. We have been taught to love the positive things, but to hate the negative things. What we have not been taught is that in the physical world God/Satan, good/evil, positive/negative, are two sides of the same coin. Just as a bar magnet could not exist without a positive end, and a negative end, this world could not exist without a mixture of positive, and negative.
What does this have to do with attention, and the Law of Attraction? When you love something, you are putting your attention on it, drawing it to you. Likewise, when you hate something you are putting attention on it drawing it to you. This creates a dichotomy which keeps us from manifesting what we truly want in life.
This is the secret of the mystics. If you want God, beauty, and the positive things to manifest in your life, align yourself with them and love them, but be indifferent to evil, and the things you don't want. By removing your attention from the negative, you allow the positive to manifest and flourish.
Each of us must be the guardian at the gate of their consciousness. Be mindful of the movies, TV shows, etc. that you allow into your state. Avoid taking sides in heated debates, and try to avoid all negative emotions such as anger, fear, and hate.
As mankind learns to focus on love, and beauty, and to be indifferent to evil, and selfishness, we will see the dawning of a new golden age.

Saturday, January 24, 2015

Stupid Things

I am dangerous with a knife in my hands. My fingers and other digits cringe in fear whenever I decide I need to cut or slice something. Sometimes, I forget which side of the blade I need to cut with, and which side I need to push down on. Other times I forget to get my fingers out of the way when I close the knife; and other times I just forget that I have a knife in my hand. Fortunately my propensity for doing stupid things with a knife is off set by my ability to heal quickly.
I also do other stupid things, such as lock my keys in the car, leave my head lights on, (thank God for that little buzzer), leave the stove on, lean back on kitchen chairs, and run on wet tile floors. I have down loaded programs that aren't compatible with my version of windows, left my cell phone in my shirt pocket, then bent over to flush the toilet, and lit my back yard gas grill with a match when the gas was on high. My miraculous healing abilities, high endurance of pain, hard head, quick growing eye brows, and the Triple A have helped me recover from some of these.
I have been known to run my mouth without engaging my brain, walk into objects that are in plain sight, light my nose on fire instead of my cigar (I have a big nose), walk into opposing stadiums wearing Oakland Raider's clothes, throw my white clothes in with the colored laundry (I went through college wearing pink underwear), wear sneakers to a dance on a gym floor, and hammer my thumb instead of the nail.
I have done other stupid things like told my wife she looks fat in that dress, microwaved a TV dinner in an aluminum foil tray, tried to rewire a switch without turning off the breaker, bathe my cat, change a light bulb without someone holding the ladder, and forget to put oil in my lawn mower.
We all do stupid things; after all we are only human. I think the only really stupid thing is to do them a second or third time. With the exception of wearing Oakland Raider's gear to opposing stadiums, I do my best to learn from my mistakes.
My guardian angel is busy enough with the mistakes I make the first time around.

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This site is more a column than a blog. I write humorous, spiritual, and political articles. Everything I write is designed to make you think; what you think is up to you.